fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
