I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
