Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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