Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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