I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
