Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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