Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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