If that was your dad, he is hot
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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