id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
