So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
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