I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize