I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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