Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
