I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
