Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
