You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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