If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize