I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Randomize