its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
