she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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