It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
