16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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