I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
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