yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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