so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
