You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
