This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
