So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
