barbara walters just said penis...
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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