her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Randomize
