There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
the night ended with taco bell and tears
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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