Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
