Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Found the puke drawer
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
