Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
