I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You made out with two different species that night
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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