I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
