I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
They have beer where we have blood.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
