Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
