Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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