on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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