My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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