Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
