I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize