just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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