You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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