I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
