You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize