Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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