it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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