What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize
